December 2007
9 posts
I think Oprah would be considerably less successful if she were white. Eminem and Amy Winehouse would be nothing without their caucasion*. This has nothing to do with Christmas. Just a deeper look into the racial divide that separates this country…
The following is very important to me, and I hope you read it as seriously as I am writing it.
Never, ever, ever fly Spirit Airlines.
This isn’t just another holiday commute horror story. This is deadly serious. They are an awful, terrible company, and none of us should ever support them. I promise, if you fly Spirit Airlines, you will be indirectly responsible for screwing what I...
1 tag
I’ve never had egg nog, and I’ve never seen any of the Lethal Weapon movies. Those are legitimate claims to fame for me. More Points of Pride as I realize them.
Say what you will, but I think The Santa Clause is a pretty goddamn cute name for a movie. Those producers have me impressed.
Every year, without fail, if you leave my Christmas presents sitting out, I will pick them up and try to figure out what’s inside. That’s just how I get down. And I’ll tell you something else, I get pretty good returns.
I think one of the worst nicknames you could have is “The Fart Machine,” or “Turdface.” I think one of the best nicknames you could have is “The Equalizer.”
I believe in a strict theory of stages. There are stages to everything. It’s no more evident than in the stages bad television. When you are watching something terrible on television, it starts out as just a bad show (Access Hollywood). Then there are shows that are even worse, but are entertaining because of how bad they are (Miami Ink). If a program is crappier than that, it will pass from...
I wanted to paint the tailpipe on my car like a cigarette. That way it would look like my car was smoking. I think maybe it’s too clever.
I think tater tots are a pretty mean snack. No way they’re getting the attention from you they deserve. Crispy. Go eat some right now.