February 2011
1 post
This is why Zappos ate everybody else's lunch →
dailybunch:
A story of customer service excellence to rival the Nordstrom tire return legend.
I live and breath consumer advocacy. I had heard great things about the company, but never shopped there. I will now buy my shoes from Zappos.
January 2011
2 posts
December 2010
1 post
I discovered ear wax on my own...
…I was a kid, and I didn’t tell anyone about it.
Those were scary times. I didn’t know if I was some kind of freak. Thought it could be brains.
November 2010
6 posts
1 tag
Just some thoughts while watching Avatar
What’s the climate on Pandora?
I mean, the vegetation looks pretty lush, so I have to assume it’s some sort of tropic atmospheric character.
So, why isn’t that a big deal in the movie? How come nobody’s sweating profusely? How is temperature acclimation not a part of Neytiri’s Na’vi teaching? How come the Sky People aren’t complaining about how hot...
2 tags
Anonymous asked: Hey Neil! Is fructose really so bad in comparison to sugar?
Anonymous asked: what do you do when you are married to someone, but love someone else?
October 2010
7 posts
INCEPTION BUTTON →
You’re welcome.
(H/T pablog)
Anonymous asked: Hi Neil,
whats your favorite halloween candy? what kind of halloween candy do you give to trick-or-treaters?
whats your favorite halloween candy? what kind of halloween candy do you give to trick-or-treaters?
thecultclassic asked: So what do you think of the new look Cavs? I know it's only the pre-season, but these guys are looking way better than I anticipated. Think there's a potential for an 8th seed finish?
2 tags
My Wife and I talk sometimes...
Tonight, my wife was watching television, and I was not.
Wife: Can you imagine being married to more than one of me?
Neil: What?
Wife: I'm watching Sister Wives.
Neil: I don't know what that means.
1 tag
September 2010
22 posts
Check out a new webseries I’m enjoying called “Tiny Apartment.” Created by the very funny comedians: Jessie Cantrell, Mike O’Gorman & Pat Driscoll.
This is Episode #1, “Sexy Night.” Great stuff right from the start. But Episode #2 is really funny too. #3 has some celebrity power, and I know you TV fans will like #4. Just watched #5, and that’s...
In case you were wondering about the plot of the... →
patdsez:
In the 1987, the good people at MGM made a Garbage Pail Kids Movie. Of course they did. And you know what? It’s so bad. But I’m sure you figured. Of course it was bad. It was a Garbage Pail Kids movie. Made in 1987. Starring Mackenzie Astin and that dead eyed girl from the classroom montage in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.
But, man oh man - the plot of this thing. It’s pretty...
Anonymous asked: Where is Waldo?
My wife and I went to see The Town last night.
Me: Could I get a medium popcorn, and a large Sprite, please.
Concessions girls: Sure. Do you want anything else?
Me: Yes. Yes, I do. I want your finest box of Buncha Crunch
Concessions girl laughs and places a box of Butterfingers on the counter.
Me: Oh, I'm sorry. I said Buncha Crunch.
Concessions girl: Oh, then that joke was even funnier.
Me: Yes it was.
Anonymous asked: Seeing as how he's one of the only athletes who successfully played two sports, is Deion Sanders really the greatest athlete of all time?
1 tag
This is important. O-H-I-O!
1 tag
My niece calls them strawbabies
Neil's brain: But if God doesn't exist, how the hell do you explain strawberries?
Neil: No, I know. I know. They're really good.
Neil's brain: They're delicious.
Neil: I love them.
Neil's brain: I LOVE them.
Neil: I know.
Neil's brain: Well?
Neil: Well, what?
Neil's brain: Where did strawberries come from?
Neil: Probably from some sort of God. You're right.
1 tag
I like Sandra Bullock...
…it’s a great story, I’m now actively rooting for Michael Oher, and I don’t even really care that they Disney’d up the SJ and Collins characters. I just have to know one thing about The Blind Side.
How did Sandra Bullock win Best Actress for that role. How did she do it?
Aren’t there 20 other actresses that could have put on that Southern accent and acted...
Who's the first rapper to quote the Bed Intruder...
Cause it’s gonna happen.
3 tags
Anonymous asked: How did you come up with the title of your blog/tumblr?
Anonymous asked: whats the best way to make a lot of money fast?
1 tag
1 tag
My wife and best friend talk convention
My friend Jay: I'm going to Atlanta, ostensibly to see friends, but also to attend Dragon-Con.
My wife: What is that?
My friend Jay: It's 30 to 40,000 nerds in downtown Atlanta enjoying nerdy books and television, rather than comics. I go and enjoy acting like I'm a little bit above it all.
My wife: Do people dress up like dragons? Is that a dumb question?
Me: Nope. It's a really good one.
My friend Jay: Totally valid. It's not like I won't see someone dressed up as a dragon...
Me: ...it's just that it's not required.
My friend Jay: Right. You don't have to.
Ed Helms vs. Ed O’Neil in a jokefest, who’d win?
A fellow contributor to NBAOffseason, HW&W (also the proprietor of one of my favorite blog titles Oakley & Allen) asked:
Ed Helms vs. Ed O’Neil in a jokefest, who’d win?
Polk High’s very own. It’s close right now, but O’Neil’s got the history.
Anonymous asked: is this true? http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l8004hC96Q1qzqqtuo1_500.jpg
Anonymous asked: My question is in two parts. First off, when making beef jerky, should the fruit (or beef?) of my labors be shared with friends or kept to myself. Secondly, will eating said beef jerky help Terrelle Pryor win a Heisman trophy?
August 2010
15 posts
1 tag
Why don't you ask me a question?
My brain has all these answers and opinions. Let me help you.
For example, are you debating which snack food to get tonight? I have the right answer.
So what are you waiting for? Ask me.
I’m like a new-age, male, half-Filipino Dr. Joyce Brothers. Did she give advice? I don’t even know.
1 tag
2 Free Yankees Tickets
Are you in the New York Metropolitan area? I have two tickets for the Yankees v. Mariners today that I cannot use.
Top deck, but first row (so no one’s in front of you). Great view of field. Section 412, Row 1, Seats 1 & 2. Simply cannot use.
They’re yours if you want them. Compliments of me.
Want ‘em?
No matter how long I live in New York City...
…I’m from the Deep Midwest, which means, every time I see a transvestite walking on the street, I stare like I’m looking at Carmelo Anthony. Fascinating.
Which movie are you all more excited to see?
The one where the guy drops all the semen into the sink and has to replace it with his own?
Or the racist one that shows how the black community acts when a young black man wins a sweepstakes?
It’s such a fake horserace.
What do you think?
I'm pretty sure I got Inceptioned tonight...
…because I just woke up and I’ve never wanted a panini so goddamn bad in my life.
The question is, "Have you spent over $250 on...
My answer is, “I’m certain.”
1 tag